Thursday, December 07, 2006

Love Like Winter Meetings

Introducing your #2 starter, Theodore Roosevelt Lilly
Be honest with yourself and rank baseball's six divisions from strongest. Lilly won 15 games last year in the AL East, easily one of the top two alongside the AL Central. Now he's in the NL Central, and there's no argument here: the Pacific Coast League's had better divisions.

The difference in level of competition alone should help his numbers dramatically. Here are Bronson Arroyo's numbers before and after he made the same change last offseason:

2004: 14-10, 4.51, 100K with Boston
2005: 14-11, 3.29, 184K with Cincinnati

If not for two-month a winless stretch from mid-June to mid-August, his win total would've well-surpassed his career high as well. There's no reason Lilly can't do the same.

No, he doesn't have a brother named Frank on the Paralympic baseball team. You're an asshole.

Jacque Jones: "Au revoir"?
As reported in the Tribune, Jacque Jones feels like he wasn't given a chance to get back in the fans' good graces after his abysmal '06 start and wouldn't mind changing area codes before Opening Day '07.

Forgive our apathy, Jacque. By the time you'd woken up, the Cubs had as good a shot at winning an Oscar as they did a division title.

As much as your throws terrify the indigenous invisible gophers dwelling in right field, we'd be happy to have you back. Lefthanded outfielders who put up .285-27-81 lines don't grow on trees. Though we should try telling Theo Epstein they do. I'm not sure anyone's paid $100MM for a tree before.

Gil Meche spurns Cubs; takes Ultimate Pitching Experience to KC
Agent: It's down to Toronto, Chicago, and Kansas City.
Gil: Lay the offers at the Tarsals of Meche.
Agent: The Jays and Cubs are right around $10MM a year. You can't go wrong. Beautiful cities, competitive teams, a chance to win a World Series...
Gil: How much is Kansas City offering Gil Meche?
Agent: A little over $11MM, but...
Gil: But shit. Has the Gil Meche Pitching Experience ever had a problem with losing, fat chicks, and/or barbecue? Sign me up twatmuffin.

Jim Hendry signs Lilly from a hospital bed
Remember when Ken Caminiti ate a Snickers bar after being on an IV all day, then belted two home runs for the Padres in Mexico? This is almost the "flabby white aristocrat" equivalent. This comparison would hold more weight if Hendry had blacked out after splitting an eight-ball with John Schuerholz.

Jason Jennings: On the move?
All signs point to yes. Much to Cubby Nation chagrin, it may be to division foe Houston instead of Chicago, as some originally thought. A proposal that involved a three-way trade with the Pirates had the Cubs giving up Jacque Jones and Carlos Marmol and receiving Jennings, a durable 28-year old righty who posted a 3.78 ERA last year in Coors Field(!).

Hendry put the kibosh on the deal when he deemed Marmol "untouchable." It seems questionable, but he said the same thing about Rich Hill last offseason, and Hill's sparkling numbers both at AAA and during the last six weeks with the Cubs seem to have vindicated Hendry.

The hope here is that Houston loses track of Jennings in the struggle to re-sign Andy Pettitte. Stay tuned.

Freddie Bynum to Baltimore
Bynum is well on his way to a 10- or 12-year Major League career based solely on his ability to run and play multiple positions. In that time, he'll play for at least 6 or 7 teams, not one of which will say afterwards, "You know who I really miss? Freddie Bynum."

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